Drive Smart Stay Safe

Did you know that the fatal car crash that killed the much loved Princess Diana and her then partner Dodi al Fayed might have had a different ending if those two had their seat belts on ? This one was the first such accident that instilled the importance of wearing a seat-belt in my mind .

Then there were two more such accidents, this time much closer to home. Couple of years back a family friend was killed while driving back from his elder brother's wedding. The strain from the journey and the lack of sleep proved fatal as he ended up dozing at the wheel. His father was also deeply injured and stayed in a coma for years. This incident radically transformed the financial condition of a well to do family and somehow things could never be the same again.

Another one was quite recent. A much adored cousin was returning home after dropping a newly married couple (who happened to be his wife's close relatives) at the groom's house. In both the incidents, the person driving the car was in a state of sleep disorientation after a night of wedding festivities and most importantly, not wearing a seat belt. Various studies and research has always thrown up figures which claim that wearing seat belts can reduce the rate of car crash fatalities by more than fifty percent and cut down on moderate to critical injuries by an equal number. A simple habit that can save many lives. That is what road safety is all about.

These are some general guidelines which I feel that people should adhere to in order to make the roads a lot more safe than they are  -

1. Do not drive if you are in a sleep deprived state. The same holds true if you have consumed alcohol. It does not matter if you think that things are under control. Both slow down your reflexes.

2. Do not talk on the phone while driving. Instead use a hands free if the call is critical. Though most of us like to believe that we are great at multi-tasking, it is better not to put lives at risk just to make a point.

3. Do not brake suddenly if a stray dog/cat comes in your way and your vehicle is going beyond 70/kmph. Though animal lovers would cry foul, it is the practical thing to be done as the vehicle travelling behind you will not be able to anticipate your move. Still worse, your own vehicle may skid/spin out of control.

4. Avoid driving in fog or during heavy rains. The reduced visibility sharply cuts down the response time available to one under normal circumstances.

5. Do not jump a red light even if the roads are deserted. There might be another idiot out there doing the same thing.

6. Do not use a high-beam while driving on the city roads. It temporarily the driver of the vehicle travelling in the opposite direction. High-beams are exclusively meant for poorly lit roads on the countryside and the highways.

7. Most importantly, use the seat belt. Even the passengers in the rear seats should abide by it.

With some common sense and discipline, we can make the roads a safer place for all.

This post is written for Nissan Safety Driving Forum which is committed to safety on the road. It endeavors to bring about a much needed change in the mindset of the people so that they realize their responsibilities while driving on the roads. NSDF is an annual activity that started in 2012 and has been conducted in cities like Delhi, Mumbai and Chennai.

Beauty Lies beyond Fear

Whether it is the fear of addressing a large crowd or the fear of looking down/jumping from heights or even something as common as the feeling of being stuck forever within a small space (also known as claustrophobia), each one of us has a personal Goliath that we would like to conquer. It keeps us from reaching greater heights and often doing things that we would love to do. Dragging us down into a vortex of self-doubt and ignominy, it makes life miserable till we decide to overcome it with sheer grit or will-power.

One of my personal fears was getting into water. Obviously not the crystal-clear aqua blue sort of waters that one finds along the beaches of Thailand or Maldives but the dark murky waters that make one fathom what lies beneath those. To my virile imagination they seem to hold a great many secrets in those churning waves and I only keep wondering about how many lives/boats they would have swallowed. That fear kept me from exploring places that I would have given a hand and a leg to visit.

It had to be overcome if I had to realize a long standing dream of exploring the beautiful Chilika Lake, the largest brackish water lagoon of India. Spread out over an area of 1100 square kms , it covers the Puri, Khorda and Ganjam districts of Odisha. It host a large number of migratory birds in the winter months and offers a whole plethora of scenic spots within the body of the lagoon. One such spot is the famed temple of Maa Kalee Jaee, the reigning deity of the lake. Legend attributes the birth of the Goddess to the appearance of the spirit of a young woman who drowned while traversing the lake to reach her husband's home situated on the other side of the lake. While her life was tragically cut short by the cruel waters of the lake during a storm which suddenly engulfed the boat, she decided to save others from a similar fate. To this very day, people offer their prayers to the Goddess while boarding a boat on this very lake.

This time however I decided to put my fears to rest and take that boat ride to visit the Goddess and enjoy the beauty of that lone island during the sunset hours. Most of the boats that ferry people to that island are old fashioned ones which lack even basic amenities like life jackets and a light. And my resolve almost gave away the moment I stepped into the boat and it started to sway wildly. But I held on amidst the growing nervousness as the boat moved away from the shore and the likeness of any civilization grew increasingly smaller. After around thirty minutes we reached a point where we were completely surrounded by water and there was no sight of any shore. This was the point where I was so taken by the glorious beauty of nature that I completely shed any lingering fear and started to truly enjoy the sights.

The sea fowl serenely sailing along the waters, a few birds swooping down to catch fish, some kind of crane/ergot standing on one leg on a protruding piece of rock and flocks of birds flying very low over the waters and the golden rays of the setting sun which had colored the lake in beautiful hues of green, blue and red were some of the rewards that I received in lieu of conquering my fears and making the journey. We reached the island just as the evening prayers (or 'aarti') was about to begin. My mind was at peace as the Goddess had already answered my prayers and freed my mind of fear. I made the return journey in a great state of mind and survived to share this wonderful experience with my readers.

This post is written for Mountain Dew . Check out their awesome video -

Coconut-coriander Chutney

Most of the chutneys are meant as accompaniments with snacks or finger foods. Maybe except for some vegetable chutneys like the ridge gourd chutney or the tomato chutney from Andhra, they taste quite insipid with rice. However, this one is an exception. Made this on the day after the Chilika trip when we were feeling quite exhausted and wanted a very simple lunch which included loads of salad and yogurt.

Read on for the recipe -

Preparation Time - 5 mins


Ingredients -

• 1 1/2 cup freshly grated coconut
• 1 cup coriander leaves (lightly packed)
• 1-2 green chili
• 2 pinch cumin seeds
• 1-2 pieces dry mango(ambula)
• 2-3 tbsp yogurt (optional)
• salt to taste 

Preparation - Grind all the ingredients (except for the yogurt and salt) together into a paste.

Mix in the yogurt (if at all used) and salt just before serving.

Can be had either with snacks or rice.

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Who decides what is right or wrong ??

The very mention of pre-Marital sex is like one of those minefields that I personally fear to tread. Considered taboo in India, I find that almost everyone has a strong opinion on the topic. And most of the time, they are dead against it (or at least they proclaim to be). Surprisingly, many of those people would easily brush aside matters like dowry, sexual harassment and even child sex abuse even without offering an opinion. Often it is looked upon as one of those alien imports that happens to be the unfortunate side effect of modernization/globalization. As if our ever burgeoning population does not provide sufficient testimony to the healthy sex drive of the Indians.

There are two ways of looking at the issue of pre-marital sex. The inside out approach and the outside in. While the first one deals with how it affects the individual, his/her perceptions about the act and his/her overall relationship with the current or future partner/soul-mate. The latter deals with how the immediate family and society perceives an individual who indulges in the act.

Focusing on the inside out approach, the degree of commitment in a relationship and awareness are the vital parameters that the individual should consider before getting into the act. While some folks may find the one-night stand approach quite cool, I feel that it has its repercussions in the long run. It lends a degree of casualness to sex and dilutes the emotional aspect of the act. Somehow all those images that we are regularly bombarded with, thanks to the omnipresent nature of today's media, the entire focus seems to be on the act itself and not on the relationship to which it should have been the natural extension. And the easy availability of contraceptives like the 'morning-after' pill seems to have exacerbated such behavior.

While pre-marital sex itself is not bad, studies have shown that it might lead to emotional problems and substance abuse at a later stage. And when the individuals involved are minors, the problem becomes much more pronounced. Teenagers are more prone to peer pressure and get influenced into doing 'it' for all the wrong reasons.

When individuals have found true happiness in each other's company and share every aspect of their life, physical intimacy is only a matter of time. It may or may not wait for the marriage decree which is merely a social sanction. Some may even choose to live-in for a short period before getting married so that they can judge the compatibility level of their relationship. However, they should be ready to deal with heartbreak if such relationships fail.

But looking at the matter from the larger perspective of the society (especially in India), women have always been treated as the sole property of men. Before marriage she is belongs to her father/brother and after her marriage she is transferred to her husband's family. Her virginity/chastity is treated as being synonymous to her family's honor and any deviation from the deeply entrenched social norms is met with harrowing consequences like honor killings. Guys are however exempt from such bindings and many of them choose to lose theirs to an older female relative or cousin or even a prostitute.   However things are changing slowly with youngsters moving to larger cities for pursuing better education/career prospects. A complete turn around maybe a long time away, but the future certainly looks brighter.

I do stand for pre-marital sex when it comes with a relationship but at the same time I would say that youngsters should have enough maturity to deal with the baggage that come with it. After all, nothing can come between consenting adults...maybe except a condom.


This entry is written for Poonaam Uppal's latest offering, A Passionate Gospel of True Love .Buy it online on Flipkart( click here ).

Sajana Phula Patua (Drumstick Flower in Mustard Paste)

This was the last dish that I made with drumstick flowers before leaving my native. A simple and authentic preparation usually made in my mother's family, it is delicious yet very healthy. Read on for the recipe -

Preparation Time - 15 mins

Ingredients -

• 1 1/2 cup drumstick flowers
• 1 medium sized potato
• 1 tsp mustard seeds
• 1 green chili
• 2-3 garlic cloves
• 3 tsp mustard oil
• 2 pinch turmeric
• salt to taste

Preparation - Wash and clean the drumstick flowers. Cut the potato into thin pieces.

Grind the mustard seeds, chili and garlic into a smooth paste.

Cooking - Heat the oil in a wok. Add the potato pieces. Fry for 2-3 mins.

Add the mustard paste along with 5-6 tbsp water. Throw in the drumstick flowers. Sprinkle turmeric and salt. Cover with a lid and cook on low flame for 3-4 mins.

Remove from flame and serve hot with rice/rotis.

Check out more drumstick flower recipes on my blog !!!

Sajana Sagaa Bhaja ( Drumstick leaves Stir Fry)

Drumstick leaves are probably the healthiest variety of greens that one can consume. Rich in calcium, phosphorous and iron, they purify blood and act as a detox . They also aid in indigestion and cure stomach ulcers if consumed regularly.

Another beneficial property is to control or regulate the blood sugar levels. Diabetics need to consume these leaves either in raw form (juice) or as a simple stir fry 3-4 times a week to see the desired results.  So, here is a simple stir fry recipe that is commonly followed in Odisha. Read on -

Preparation Time - 15 mins


Ingredients -

• 2 cups drumstick leaves
• 3-4 garlic cloves
• 1 red chili
• 1 pinch mustard
• salt to taste
• 2 tsp oil ( i use mustard)

Preparation - Remove the leaves from the stem carefully inspecting them for any insects or insect eggs. The insects are usually tiny black ones while the eggs vary from pale green to white. Throw away such leaves.

Wash the leaves carefully in warm water to which a little salt has been added. Transfer to a colander and allow water to drain off.

Cooking - Heat the oil in a wok. Once it gets smoking, add broken chili and mustard seeds.

Add the crushed garlic flakes and allow them to brown a bit before adding the leaves.

Stir fry for a few minutes on medium to high till excess water evaporates. Most tender leaves get cooked by this time but if the leaves are somewhat mature, then cover with a lid for 1-2 minutes so that they can get cooked.

Remove from wok and serve hot with white rice /rotis.

Note - Drumstick leaves can also be prepared with moong dal and/or vegetables.